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Tuesday, April 5, 2011

No. 23 Some unforgettable lines that may someday be forgotten ...



A newlywed Island husband walked out of his wedding at the Methodist Church with his new wife and crossed the road to Carl Lewis’ store, at that time the largest and busiest enterprise on the Island. The new couple sat down at the counter near the front of the store and the groom excitedly ordered himself a bottle of Coca Cola. Noticing that Carl seemed to glance toward the bride and motion as if to remind him that he not mentioned ordering anything for her, the man sheepishly looked her in the eye and asked, “You didn’t want nothing, Did ya?”

It is said that Marshall Lewis once reported to his friends that he had wrecked his car. When asked what had happened, he explained that he had “backed her head first into a ditch.”

A Harkers Island boy who had grown homesick while working on a scallop boat off the coast of Florida decided to hitchhike home. Arriving at the Island a few days later he was asked what was the biggest city he saw while on his way home. Without hesitation he responded, “Baltimore.”

Two Island fishermen were working their nets along the shore one morning when they began a discussion of the news that they had gleaned from the radio and newspapers about the war in Europe. One of them began by stating, “I heard that a lot of people got killed last week in a place called Normandy. I heard it was almost two thousand.” His friend responded, “I heard it was more than that. I heard it was eighteen hundred.”

After a church group went to New Bern to donate blood, they were rewarded with a meal at one of the finer restaurants in town. One of the Island boys ordered a plate of baked ham, and reviewing the menu, asked for a side order of “yams.” When the meal was delivered he looked it over and then complained to his waitress, “Mam, I ordered yams, but I hate to tell ye, —  that ain’t nothing but sweet potatoes.”

Lib Brooks once told me of being awakened at night by the sound of sirens on the road near his father J B’s home at the westard. With his father they went out to explore and found that there had been a bad car wreck at the sharp curve on Red Hill. By the time he got to the scene, the State Trooper had arrived and was in his patrol car writing a memo in his file. It appeared that when called to the accident he already was carrying a sleeping “drunk driver” in his back seat that he had arrested earlier. While the patrolman was preparing his report, his prisoner slowly awoke and began to ask questions about where he was and what was going on. “What is it?” he asked. “It was a bad wreck,” the officer responded. “Who was it?” the captive continued. “Someone driving drunk,” the officer replied. With a sudden look of fear and concern, the prisoner grew aroused and shouted, “Oh me! Was I hurt?” 

Sheriff Hugh Salter once drove to Raleigh to pick up an Islander who had been released from prison after serving time for domestic issues. Because the sheriff was good friends with the man and his family, Hugh volunteered to take his charge out for a nice lunch before beginning the long trip back to the Island. Accustomed to fine eating while in the state’s capital, Hugh carried the parolee to the Velvet Cloak Inn, one Raleigh’s finest restaurants. After taking the sheriff’s order for a plate of prime ribs, the waitress turned to his companion and asked what he wished to order. Anxious for something that was familiar after eating prison food for several months, he anxiously proclaimed that he wanted “two hot dogs.” The waitress was more than a bit startled by the request, and condescendingly informed the Islander that “this restaurant does not serve hot dogs.” Looking up with his own expression of surprise he responded, “you mean to tell me that a cafĂ© this big don’t have no hotdogs?”

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